California Dreaming

This is as far as my story ever got, but hey at least when i have to write it again I’ll have some of it done already

Also, this is mostly just a mash up of different scenes that I had written throughout class, there are more notes than there is story right now.  disclaimer over.

Finding Faith

Exactly one week ago, her dreams were ruined. She sat in the tall grass watching the sun set below the trees in the forest as it had everyday for the past twenty years or, at least, for as long as she had known the forest to be there. The golden rays cast an eerie glow across the back lawn, forming silhouettes similar to humans, with their branches stretching out towards the house like hands. An unsettling calm fell over the area and not a sound could be heard. The clouds didn’t move, holding in time the rich oranges and purples that could only be seen at this time of day. Stuck in that moment, lost in time.

So many memories from that lawn. Childhood shenanigans, drunken pool parties, and the scoldings after both. All here, in this very spot, yet it never seemed quite as memorable as it did that night. The hours, which flew by filled with laughter and chaos, were now silenced by the memories of such things. Suddenly, the chirp of a cricket broke through the entrancing silence and the world resumed it’s natural pace.

The sky looked different then, as if changed, prepared to let go of the day. Maybe it finally realized that it’s time to move onto the mystery of tomorrow instead of holding onto the glow of the day.

Now here she sat, her head throbbing from the amount of shit she’d had to deal with in the past few days. If only she knew a way to calm her mind. She had been shown before, but had the feeling she should have payed more attention. Now it was a little too late. She could hear the cars as they whipped past the windows, thinking to herself, as the headphones in her ears played a soft and melodic tune.

“NO SHE DIDN’T!” Katherine heard from across the bus, as two girls erupted with laughter. “There’s no way! Oh well, I knew she was going to end up being a total whore.” She had always hated these conversations. The ones shared between giddy high school girls still caught up in the endless drama of boys and bad teachers. Now though, she wished more than anything that she had a friend sitting next to her to laugh with. Or at least someone to share with the fear that was growing deep inside of her, spreading roots throughout her body and branching out into her limbs. She could feel each strange jab of pain every time she would let the thought creep back into her mind.

Sandra would have been able to calm her. She always had that way of soothing her nerves, even when it seemed like the world was tumbling down around them. Which is exactly how it felt at the moment, only this time caused by the very person that would normally help her through. She’d always had a problem with death. Whenever the subject would come up in conversation she would find careful ways to bring the discussion back to a lighter topic. It wasn’t as if she hadn’t accepted the fact that everyone dies, nor that she too would someday reach the end, it was just one of those subjects that was better left alone. She felt that talking about it was pointless. If everyone dies, then why waste any time talking about it or questioning it? Kat wondered if her friend would have thought any differently had she known how soon this end would come for her.

It had been only a week since she’d gotten the phone call. She was all the family that Sandra had left. Though not by blood, they were sisters in every other form of the word. So she wasn’t surprised when they told her that she had been listed as the person to contact in case of emergencies. Though what they told her next would not only surprise her, but tear her apart.

She had been in Michigan when the phone rang, packing up boxes, preparing herself for the upcoming move to San Diego. Fantasizing of all the adventures that her and her friend would share in the big city. Her first big moment in life, the first chance she had to be on her own, to get out of the small town that had made her feel so trapped all her life. It wasn’t mere coincidence that she had chosen to apply to UCSD, though it did unnerve her a little that she had never even seen the city before. It was okay though, Sandra had been going there for a year and would be able to show her the ins and outs of college life. These were her thoughts at least, until she answered the phone.

Now here she sat. Alone on the Greyhound, counting down the hours until the bus driver would announce that they’d reached the California border. Five to go, and then she would arrive, not knowing a single living soul. She’d never been good at being on her own, and with the recent news it was hard to imagine a way to survive it. As if classes wouldn’t be hard enough, now she had to make new friends, get good grades, all the while planning a funeral for the one person she cared about most in her life. She felt selfish, and though she would never say it out loud, she couldn’t help but think, why now, of all times? How could her friend just leave her like this, so vulnerable, alone. Why couldn’t it have been her that had died? At least then she would have left behind someone who had already settled into their life, who knew what was going on. Why couldn’t that man have lived in Michigan instead of California? And why did he choose the most important week of both of their lives to fall asleep behind the wheel?

A few weeks into this new life the sound of fire trucks and police sirens were starting to blend together with the rush hour traffic. It seemed as though the city would never fall asleep. Sure it would take a break occasionally, but only to revive itself seconds later, like a child nodding off in a classroom.

How could anyone get comfortable in place like this? Maybe that’s why there are so many businesses advertising yoga every few blocks. People need someplace to go to escape all of this madness, even if it’s just within their own minds.

Even the sky looks like it needs a good, long nap. Still bright at two a.m., reflecting the lights of various skyscrapers and twenty-four hour businesses. It’s funny how the sky always seems to match the mood of the city here. In the mornings it becomes dull and grey, mirroring the attitudes of everyone on the street, sleep still in their eyes.

All of these people, knowing where to go, headed off to perform their daily rituals at their local coffee shops and newsstands. Finding their own personal ways of escaping the traffic in their minds. Who knows, maybe caffeine is the solution to this city.

Her first few weeks went as you would expect, and she soon found that school and work weren’t the hardest parts of being on her own, it was the alone part that got her. She had put so much hope in the fact that Sandra would be here to guide her on her way. To teach her what to do, where to go, who to talk to. Now she had nothing, and no one really seemed to even notice she was there. Though, right now, she wasn’t really sure if that’s what she needed anyway. She almost felt as though she would be trying to replace her friend by looking for another. So she kept to herself and didn’t speak unless spoken to for quite some time.

One day, while she was in her sculpture class, a girl in light purple pigtails came up to her and asked if she could borrow some clay. She had plenty in front of her, and it was free to anyone, so of course she inclined and handed it over to the girl. She looked down at what Kat was sculpting.

“Are you sad?” She asked politely.

“Why would you ask that?” whispered Kat as she set down the paintbrush she was using to glaze with.

“I’m not sure, I mean, you look well enough, I just got this feeling as though there are too many thoughts buzzing around in your head.” She pulled up a seat next to her and slammed the clay down onto the table and started kneading into something manageable. “You know, someone told me once that thoughts are like bees, and you can’t let them linger too long up there, or they’ll build up into a hive and the honey will make them all stick together like glue. Now you don’t want that do you?”

“Well no, of course not. Who in the world talks like that?” she asked politely.

“Someone who only has one bee in their head at a time, and is hopelessly happy.” she replied with a small grin.

They went back and forth like this for quite some time, discussing different things. Katherine could not believe the strange thoughts coming out of this girls mouth, but couldn’t help but now imagine them as little bee’s flying out one by one.

“Have you ever been to a circle?” the girl asked Katherine, to which she replied, “I’ve drawn one.”

The girl sent out a high pitched, but timid laugh and said, “I’ll be having one at my house on Thursday night. You can come if you’d like, we’ll be focusing on clearing our thoughts and settling the mind, you seem like you could use a little help with that. OH! And their will be free food, so don’t be shy. There’s no room for questioning yourself when there is food involved,” and with that she was off. It seemed almost as quickly as she had come, she wished she would have stayed a bit longer. She looked back at the table at which the girl had just sat and saw the sculpture that she had been too busy to notice before, having been caught up in her own work. A half foot bumblebee peeked his head around behind him, staring into her eyes. Seeming to question her. Will you go or not? With a tattoo of an address carved into it’s delicate wing.

Thursday Night rolled around and she found herself walking off of the bus towards the girls house. Once at the door she lifted her arm as if to knock, then slowly let it fall back down. Twice again this happened, and at the third attempt the door swung open and the girl stood there with a big grin on her face, pearly white teeth sparkling with excitement. There were people moving about behind her, and she wore a long, soft, yellow robe that draped down past her toes, and were beginning to fray at the bottom.

“Come on in! You know, you shouldn’t have hesitated, the snacks are almost gone! But it’s ok, we’ll eat some more afterwards.” she said enthusiastically, raising her voice so she could hear over the crowd of noise that flooded the apartment. Katherine wondered how anyone thought they could find peace of mind amongst this.

“Why is everyone in robes?” she asked quietly.

“It makes it easier for the body to breath, so that you don’t have to worry about it when you leave it behind.” she replied simply.

“What exactly do you…” Kat was cut off and the noise died down a little as a girl in a light blue robe, with a booming voice informed everyone that they would be heading down to the beach in ten minutes.

“Come on, I have extra robes in my room.” whispered the girl.

Kat followed her through the hallway towards the back of the apartment. “We’re going to the beach?”

“Yeah, that was a bit of last minute scheduling on my part.” Said the girl, rustling through her tiny closet. “I wanted you to see my favorite spot to release my bees.”

“You moved the entire thing for me?” she asked, a little taken aback.

“Basically, but it’s no problem, it gets stuffy in this tiny place anyway.” she said as she shoved a bay leave green robe in her face and told her, “Hurry! We don’t have much time left.”

The next few minutes blurred together as she slipped on the robe and removed her clothes underneath. She rejoined the group a few minutes later as they were all rushing out the door. She didn’t understand what the big hurry was if they were all trying to be relaxed and peaceful. But once they reached the edge of the beach everyone quieted, and the girl she’d come to know turned towards the crowd and spoke in a quiet whisper to everyone.

“Tonight we seek peace amongst the chaos, and to rid ourselves of unnecessary thoughts. If you are troubled, we will calm you. If you are lost, we will do our best to light your path. Follow me now, into the circle.” She let the last sentence drift off into the tide, and turned slowly steadying her pace and humming loudly to herself.

Nothing made much sense at the moment. The tides being pushed and pulled over the pebbles lining it’s shore, in an indecisive game of tug-o-war. The sun coming up just over the horizon of the ocean, and one ship drifting lazily across it’s surface, as they often did. They paraded towards the cliffs and wove in and out of jutting rocks. It seemed as though someone knew where they were going, though no one spoke, only followed. Then the cliffs opened up and the sky glistened underneath the moon.

The boulders surrounding the cove towered overhead, the shape of it’s edges mirroring the crescent moon, glistening in the white sands.

Not many people knew of this area. It had been discovered only by a few locals, and the occasional wandering pothead, but no one ever talked about it, as if the place didn’t even exist at all. No one was ever there, but remnants of past visitors held proof that there were more than one that knew it’s location.

The wind stirred, sending a chill throughout the air, with the sun becoming barely visible as it rose slowly over the horizon to meet the moon. Meanwhile the ripples continued to move in and then away from the shore, licking the edges as if testing the sand as a child would dip in a toe to check the temperature.